so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
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