Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
it's like heaven, but drunker
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
