you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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