dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
