we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
A+ Viking dick
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
