Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
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