just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
