..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize
