i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Randomize
