I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
