Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Randomize