I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
