There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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