im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
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