p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Randomize
