Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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