Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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