I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
