Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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