4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
