Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
It's rum buckets o'clock
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
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