K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
God I need to hump something, right now.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
