the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
