Got a toothbrush?
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
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