i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize
