Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
