But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
