i just wanna soil my oats bro
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
