I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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