Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
