why didn't you poke me back
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize
