mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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