Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
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