so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
