glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
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