he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
