I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Randomize
