i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
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