this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
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