How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
