capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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