It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
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