ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
