You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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