His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
