Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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