The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
