whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
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