yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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