sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Randomize
